Lessons Learned from a Teacher's Travels: Chapter 2 - A Reflection
Gayle Winney
Citrus Heights Elementary
What's the best gift: Time or Money?
As many readers might know from my previous article, every year I spend approximately five months out of the country in the Dominican Republic. Most of that time is spent providing services to people in need: working with orphaned children, advising teachers in small local schools, and directing a small church choir at a Catholic church.
The Dominican Republic is a very poor country. Many of its inhabitants depend heavily on the money remittances they receive from relatives and friends abroad. Some Dominican organizations receive financial assistance from foreign entities in Europe and the USA. As it happens in other parts of the world, only a percentage of the foreign financial contributions actually reach the intended destinataries. I have learned to avoid the middle men and women here and take the contributions I bring straight to the people who need them. Another important lesson I have learned is that some people need my time in the Dominican Republic more than they need my money. But don't get me wrong, money can provide for many of their daily necessities.
Money is scarce for most people with whom I interact in the Dominican Republic. Unemployment and underemployment are rampant. Most families are struggling to put some food on the table. I, on the other hand, was fortunate to have not one but three jobs in the USA for the past six years. Sometimes I am not quite sure how I managed to juggle two countries and three jobs, but I did it and managed to remain relatively sane (although my parents and some friends question my sanity because I choose to be out of the country so often).
The salary from one of my three jobs in the States was devoted to my charity/humanitarian work for the people in Santiago, Dominican Republic. In just six years, I have observed how my financial contributions have helped others: the church has new musical equipment, one of the local schools has supplies for each child to use, my neighbors has life-saving medication which has improved the quality of their lives and children at an orphanage have milk twice a day to supplement their low-protein/heavy starch staple diet. All of these things are vital to the sustainability of my community here. BUT, what I have come to observe is that what people here need the most is my time. Luckily, I have plenty of time to give them.
For example, Jonathan is a six-year old resident at the orphanage where I am volunteering this summer. With the help of many friends, I am financially sponsoring some of the expenses of the orphanage. Jonathan spent the first five years of his life living in the streets, under a highway, with his mentally ill and drug-addicted mother. He entered the hospital near death at age five and stayed there alone for almost six months. He had no family visits and depended on the limited care that overworked nurses could provide to him. If lucky, he received an occasional touch from people who were visiting their own children. When Jonathan was eventually released from the hospital he entered the orphanage at age six. He has been there for almost a year.
When I first encountered Jonathan, he cried most of the time. When he sat in my lap he stopped crying, but did not speak. He also ate his meals in silence and generally away from other children at the orphanage. After we had known each other for about six months, he began speaking to me. He started communicating with simple words and progressed to short sentences.
When I came to Santiago, Dominican Republic, in June of this year, I brought with me a plastic bat and ball I had purchased from the Dollar Store. I brought these simple toys with the intention to teach Jonathan how to use them during the summer. Baseball is the national sport of the Dominican Republic, and there are very few boys who do not know how to use a bat and ball here. Because Jonathan had been living under the highway and later at the hospital, he did not have much exposure to televised or real baseball.
The orphanage staff told me Jonathan was not crying as much and that they had not seen Jonathan laugh so much before. It was as if the bat and the ball along with the time I spent teaching him a few basic techniques of the game have opened up the flood gates of his inner world. He appeared happy and started socializing better with the other kids at the orphanage.
Every day when I drove up to volunteer at the orphanage, Jonathan ran out with his bat and ball in hand. One night when I was at the orphanage late, I stopped by Jonathan's dorm around 8:30 p.m. to tuck him in and say goodnight. There he was asleep in his top bunk bed with his arms around his plastic Dollar Store bat and ball -- a mental picture I will carry with me always. At that moment, I knew that the time that I had spent with this child was so much more important than anything that I could buy for him.
I am not saying that a child's happiness can be bought with two trinkets from the Dollar Store. What I am saying is that a few dollars and a couple of hours could go a long way in making a child happy. Children at the orphanage where Jonathan lives need food, clothing, medical care, and school supplies. We are seeing that they get them. A US$25.00 donation buys milk for breakfast for all the children or a visit to the dentist for one of the children. Please don't get me wrong. They need money for basic survival. But they also need time. They crave for attention. Whereas they express some interest when people show up at the orphanage with donation bags, their faces light up with joy when people stop by to play with them, to listen to their stories, to give them a hug and a kiss. These children don't know and don't care how the electrical bill will be paid each month. What they long for is a human touch, a friendly smile, a warm hug.
Those of us in the USA who have all the material comforts money can buy can easily forget the effect of a human touch, a friendly smile, and a warm hug. In the rush of our daily lives we make sure our dear ones have a roof over their heads, clothes on their backs and food on their plates. We should take a minute to think about Jonathan and the other children in our lives. They need to know that we are here for them. We need to remind them that there are things money cannot buy. Time is one of them. The time we give our children is important because that will be what they remember most. When the expensive tennis shoes and the sophisticated computer games are gone, our children will not remember them. But I can assure you they will remember the time we spent with them playing, walking, joking and doing trivial things. These small, special moments will shape their lives and contribute to the person they will become in the future. It is during these moments that children are more receptive to what we do and what we say to them. Please take advantage of these golden opportunities to have a lasting effect on your child.
And next time you are near a Dollar Store, check it out. You would be surprised by the many gadgets they have there. Be a child for a minute. Choose a simple toy that can give you and your child hours of fun. Better yet, build a simple toy that would keep you and your child occupied for a couple of hours and give both of you unlimited fun.
Keep the sun screen on while you play. See you soon.
Gayle Winney
Citrus Heights Elementary